Plant Killers Anonymous

“My name’s Charlotte and I’m a plant killer”

“Hi Charlotte”

If there was a ‘Plant Killers Anonymous’ I would be a fully fledged member. I have killed succulents (a desert dwelling plant that requires little to no attention), basil pots wilt on my windowsill and the planter that I was given full of my wedding flowers has certainly seen better days.

Seeking advice from my green fingered mother-in-law Amanda, I asked where I could be possibly going wrong….

“Well”, she asked me through suppressed giggles, “how often do you water it?!”

The guilt that wracked my face nearly had her spitting out her mouth full of tea. (note to self: waiting for the rain to look after your plants is apparently not enough)

Bolstered by this new found knowledge (watering is important…who knew!), and determined to leave the infamous PKA (Plant Killers Anonymous) I called upon one of the other gardenerning experts in my life.

My grandma is a marvel in the garden. No matter what she has been given and in no matter what state, she’ll produce a little oasis. She can tell you the Latin name for everything too. As well as giving you advice on how much it likes the sun and how deep to bury it!

So arm in arm we marched into the garden center and after a lot of advice and a bit of chopping and changing I had everything I needed to set up my very own balcony garden.

And I only bloody well did it! 

Believe it or not dear reader but I have (successfully!!) kept alive a herb pot containing mint, lemon thyme and sage, a bay tree/bush….who knows, salva and lavender and I’ve even tried my hand at some veg.

I have ACTUALLY NOT KILLED 2 courgette plants and a tomato plant.

The courgette plant has even grown little EDIBLE courgettes. It’s a flipping marvel! 

We’re even considering taking on an allotment….. Move over Monty Don!

That reminds me – I must get to watering!

– C XxX 


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